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Couples in business: Should you do it?

Posted on 15, May | Posted by JaneFrankland

Mixing business with pleasure…

Family businesses and working wiht your husband or boyfriend should you do it by Jane FranklandUp above, you’re in love…down below you’re too slow! When it comes to the subject of couples in business and working with your boyfriend or husband I was clearly too slow, but that’s for another post [dot, dot, dot].

They say for better or worse, for richer or poorer but no one ever mentions at the office AND at home, do they? Now whether you made those vows or not, I know the thought has crossed your mind…

So should you go into business or even work with your  boyfriend, or husband (aka your “beloved”) in an effort to gain financial freedom, and spend more time with your family?

Now before I give you my take on this, I want you to know that this has been a post I’ve been meaning to write for a long time. Those of you who know my story are probably thinking OMG what the ‘BLEEP’ is she going to write!

Have no fear – I’m a pro!

You see, I’ve first hand experience of building a business and working with my (ex) beloved! I worked with him for just over 13 years and we owned a company together for 16 years.

I have to be honest – it’s not a pretty story. There were both good and bad times. Owning a company and working together is not going to work out well for the vast majority of you. Very, very few can pull it off.

Sorry to burst your bubble!

The truth of the matter is few couples’ relationships are strong enough to weather the storm. It’s not an easy ride. So the question is….are you the exception to the rule?

Video break [I'm still being well behaved]

Disadvantages of couples in business

There’s an old saying, “you shouldn’t work with friends or family” and having done both, I can understand why! But, that’s my story, so the question is, can you survive working together? Let’s look at the challenges…

There’s no real separation between work and home life

They say you need to set boundaries and have a clear separation between your work and personal life, but that’s easier said than done. Take it from me, when you work and live together you never really switch off from work. There’s always an opportunity to talk about it. Whether you’re feeding the baby, out having dinner, on holiday or in bed making out!

I’m not joking…seriously! And, from a business perspective, it can actually be quite productive; there’s a lot you can achieve!

Yep you heard me right!

However, from a personal relationship perspective it can be so damaging. For example, I remember several times returning home from the office, annoyed with my partner for not fulfilling something during the day. It was hard to look him in the eye, when he got home, with love. He’d let me down on a job and I was the one who had to answer to our client the next day. There was no getting away from it. I had two choices – 1) to bury it and let it fester or 2) to communicate my feelings and work to resolve it that night. This leads me naturally on to my next point.

You need to be very conscious of each others feelings

This point is particularly relevant when expressing criticism. Remember you’re sharing your bed with this person and you don’t want to start a personal war. Effective communication is paramount if you’re going to be successful in business together so get good at it and resolve any disagreements immediately. Harbouring ill thoughts will kill your relationship.

You need to find ways to keep your relationship alive

If you’re working in close proximity it’s very easy to get bored of one another no matter how much you care for each other. In my opinion, the only way to deal with this is to have an active life outside of work (independently) and a good social life. When you don’t and your day consists of working on the business and then seeing to the kids, you end up being quite cut off from the world and living in a bubble.

You need to agree how to make decisions

You need to agree who’s the boss and if your business operates on 50-50 share split, who’s voice gets priority. If it’s 50-50 split, you need to decide what will happen in a stale-mate situation. This is vital. In my company we both owned 100% of the shares and although there was an MD we decided that if we both couldn’t agree on something, no action would be taken. Agreement was vital for the company to move forward.

You need to have legal agreements in place

No matter how much you trust one another, you need legal agreements in place. I CAN’T STRESS THIS ENOUGH. No one has a crystal ball and when money is involved some people view things in a very different way. They get greedy.

You need to make sure they’re the most qualified for the job

This is a hard one as you’re going to have to take out all the emotion and communicate this in a diplomatic way. One of the best things you can do is to agree this rule upfront. In my business, this is what we did. If someone was more capable of doing the job then they would be employed. Neither my partner nor I maintained our positions by default. We either had to step up, learn the skills and perform for the sake of the business, or we stepped aside and let another take our place. In some cases, there was never a question of us doing the job. It was clear from the offset that we didn’t have the skills and didn’t want them either.

Advantages of couples in business

You’re more understanding of one another

Working together actually brings in a whole new level of understanding in a couple. You have a totally shared experience that brings you closer together. You’re both on the same page. You understand why you’re doing what you’re doing. You’re both working for the same end goal, pulling in the same direction and as a consequence you work with more understanding and gumption.

For example, I remember having to book my partner in for jobs over the weekend of Bank holidays, or even our children’s birthdays. Had he come home and told me someone at work had done this I’d have been quite resentful, but because I’d done it (as we were growing our business) it was OK.

You’ve got more flexibility

Having built a business along with raising a family I can honestly say it’s much easier when you can do this as a family unit. Again, you’re both on the same page and you can always find ways to deal with child care or take time out to be at their school for an event. You can also have lunch breaks together or agree who’s working late and with remote access and mobile communication anything is possible.

You’ll achieve more and build a successful business

Napoleon Hill wrote about this in a chapter of his book Think and Grow Rich. It was all about sex transmutation. He said that love, romance, and sex are all emotions that are capable of driving men to heights of super achievement. Love is the emotion which serves as a safety valve, and insures balance, poise, and constructive effort. When combined, these three emotions may lift one to an altitude of a genius. All I can say is that I know what we achieved! [Wink, wink]

Now I want to hear from you!

Ever mixed business with your boyfriend or husband? Tell me whether you found it to be a good experience or not. Leave your story in the box below.

With love and gratitude – as always,

 

 

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Selling: the biggest myth in sales busted

Posted on 10, May | Posted by JaneFrankland

The one thing no one tells you about selling

Selling and how to sell more by Jane Frankland
People buy from people, right?

Well, yes and no.

You heard me right!

Bar humbug. Buggery pollocks! [a pollock is a fish, wink, wink!]

Yep, you’ve been misled, but don’t feel bad. I was taught the same thing too about selling and it’s not all wrong.

You see, whilst people do buy from people they know, like and trust, there’s a little more to it than this. And, it affects every bit of sales and marketing work that you do.

So let’s be crystal clear…

When it comes to buying, this is not about you. The only reason anyone’s talking to you is to meet their own needs, wants and desires – to get their problems solved. It has nothing to do with you so don’t pamper your own ego for one more second.

Cue story…

Now that I’ve cleared that up, let’s pretend your name is Anna (sorry if you’re a bloke – just get into character). You love what you do, but you can’t seem to get enough clients in the door. You’re getting pe-ed off, you’re feeling discouraged AND you’re worried you might even need to quit this entrepreneurship ‘malarkey’ and go back to your job to make ends meet. The thought fills you with dread. You’re pursuing your passion for goodness sake!  You know people would chunner if you jacked it in. So you take action.

What do you do?

Well as you’re smart AND you know what you’re doing, you’d go back to basics first. You’d look at your ideal client avatar, your messaging and then how you’re selling. BUT [here it is...] You’d do so via a filter of emotional intelligence.

Let me explain…

Emotional intelligence

When I asked a group of entrepreneurs how they felt about the word selling and sales people recently, their answers didn’t come as a shock. They largely boiled down to this:

“It depends on how much I want what they’re selling. If I want it, and they know what they’re talking about and they’re not pushy, then I like the process and the people selling. However, if I’m not sure I want it, or they don’t know what they’re talking about, or they’re trying to push something on me, then I don’t like it (or them for that matter) at all.”

Their answers were judgemental, yet insightful as they revealed an emotional connection (or disconnection) between the buyer and vendor i.e.

  • Emotional desire (if it is what I want)
  • Intelligence (if they know that they’re talking about)
  • Emotional approach (if they’re not pushy)

They all required an emotional satisfaction filter and it’s this that’s the key to selling (and marketing for that matter). This is the one thing that no one teaches you:

“People buy feelings, not people.” – Jane Frankland TWEET THIS

Furthermore, the more competitive an environment is, the more they need this; and the more apparent it becomes amongst the suppliers who aren’t providing it.

So, if you want more clients and sales, your task is simply to help your avatar feel emotions and to emotionally connect.

Now, there are lots of ways to do this and a tonne I could write about it here, so I’m going to have to tackle this in several blogs. Let’s look at an aspect of your sales copy here, which is essential if you’re selling online.

Video break

Sales copy

I was reading a blog by Ash Ambirge, from The Middle Finger Project the other day. That woman is smart! And, she talked about this in her blog – selling anything in one paragraph or less. She spoke about product descriptions and how they don’t help sell anything. She had a point. Aside from SEO I personally couldn’t see any value either, especially after she’d highlighted the obvious! Doh!

The first thing she talked about was building desire. Your prospect or client has to desperately want what you’re selling. And, one of the best ways to inspire the feeling in your avatar isn’t to describe the product; it’s to describe who they’ll become with the product.

You need to help them envision. Help them picture. Write the story! Empower them. Make them feel good. See J.Peterman for an example.

Sales relationships

There’s no denying that writing great copy builds an emotional connection with your avatar, but another way to do this is by building strong relationships with your prospects and clients face-to-face, or over the phone/Skype.

Using Anna as my muse, she used to think that the key to selling her products and services was by showing her clients what she knew and what she could do. In her early days of sales she’d go on and on about features and benefits. When she became wiser, she realised that her clients actually came (and stayed) with her on account of the relationships she’d built with them. They’d come to feel comfortable with her as a person. She made them feel good about interacting with her. And, she’d mastered emotional intelligence to do this.

Now I want to hear from you…

Do you use emotional selling techniques at all?  What selling techniques can you recommend? What part of Anna’s story resonates with you? Have you tackled it at all? If so please leave me a comment in the box below.

P.S. If you know anyone who could benefit from this insight, take a second and send them a link to this post. You’ll be helping me… and THEM!

With love and gratitude – as always,

 

 

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Hate selling? Think it stinks? Find out what’s really going on [part 1]

Posted on 2, May | Posted by JaneFrankland

Love or hate selling?

Selling and why it stinks by Jane FranklandHere’s the truth. There are TOO many people who think they don’t like sales or even hate selling. They think it’s icky and sleazy, and regularly come out with statements like “I don’t like asking for the money.”

Sound familiar?

Now until recently I used to think that if I can just teach these people that sales is a caring profession – it’s about helping people (by solving problems or matching needs to wants), and then show them how to sell, all will be fine.

How wrong was I?

You see so many people don’t actually have a problem with sales or selling.  So many people don’t actually hate selling. The problem they have is actually their relationship with money. And it gets worse. It’s usually deep rooted.

Now here’s a strange thing.  You can do very well in sales and still have this problem! However, here’s the sting…If you don’t address this, no matter how much money you make or how many times money comes into your life,  you’ll LOSE it.

I speak from experience…

Here’s my story [I'll keep it brief]

Once upon a time I was a designer. I loved my work with a passion. I’d been nominated as a Young British Designer, had an agent and was selling my work globally to Hong Kong, Tokyo, LA, New York, Paris and London.

Sounds a bit glam doesn’t it?

Sadly it wasn’t. I was eating my son’s left over scraps, unable to pay the utility bills and I was making next to nothing.

Bummer!

So I struck a deal with the universe when someone advised me to go and get a ‘proper’ job!

I said, “I’ll give up my passion if in return you reward me with lots of money.” And, that’s exactly what happened. I retrained, got head-hunted for a corporate job with great prospects, and then left it to to build a 7-figure business (with the man whom I thought was my soul mate).

The universe was serving me well.

Or was it?

Cue the roller coaster of life! It was early 2002 and the dot com bubble burst was in full flow. My business partner and I were caught out. We’d had the business for 5 years and were faced with a choice – to liquidate or to recover. We chose the latter and then worked like there was no tomorrow. We remodelled the company almost overnight and 2 years later it was more profitable than it had ever been. We’d had a close shave but this was not the worst that was to come (for me).

Several years later my partner called time on our relationship and then decided he wanted the company all for himself. [Muhaha!] I was forced out of my own company in ways that I won’t disclose. All I’ll say is it was unpleasant!

And this is where the moral of the story kicks in.

Surprisingly it’s not on choosing your business partner! That’s definitely a subject for another post! ;)

The moral of the story is always to do what you love. Don’t chase the dollar. Find a way to make it work. Then you will do great work.

So now for some key points on getting over the mantra of so many entrepreneurs and start-ups: “I hate selling” [but I like making sales!]

By the way I’m only going to concentrate here on your relationship to money (not self worth or rejection issues, which might also be going on.)

The first point I want to make is that when it comes to money you are the economist of you, so you need to decide what you want money for. Do you want it for ‘stuff’ to own or for ‘stuff’ to experience, or both? There’s no right or wrong answer here. It’s a personal choice. However, once you get clear on the purpose for your money you have a rudder to guide your purchases, savings, investments and donations. And you get motivated!

A word of caution. You can only get clear on your purpose for money when you get clear on your desired life. And, your desired life is driven by the way you want to feel.

In my case I wanted to feel happy. I knew that being a designer would fulfil this. However, I knew that I couldn’t make enough money to support my family as a designer. [I'd tried.] As a result, I chose to find a 6-figure job and build a 7-figure business. The purpose for my money became financial stability.

So if money enables so many of our wants to be manifested, get clear on the purpose, and…

“Let the money follow the thinking but let the thinking follow the feeling” ~ Jane Frankland TWEET THIS

The second point I want to make is that “money is only a tool. It will take you wherever you wish but it will not replace you as the driver.” – Ayn Rand.

Video break


For me I’d let the money control me. When I’d struck that deal with the universe I’d sold my soul. I’d relinquished my passion. Money was not serving me. It was controlling me. Money was the one in the driving seat, not me. How did I truly know this? Well the result revealed itself recently.

I bet you’re wondering how?

Well despite being a top sales person and being responsible for building a 7-figure business, I suffered (for the first time ever) an inability to do fee-paying work. I’d work for free, but if money were to cross my palms I’d literally run a mile. This meant I wasn’t charging for work, sending invoices once work was done and not even quoting when asked. As a hard-core salesperson this still makes me twitch! I clearly had a dire relationship issue with money!

The good news is, help arrived to resolve this and I’ll be sharing exactly how in part 2.

If you can’t wait until then, check out T.Harv Eker. He first introduced me to the concept of winning the money game and how it relates to why people can hate selling.

Now I want to hear from you…

Do you love or hate selling? What selling techniques can you recommend if you hate selling? What part of my story resonates with you? Have you tackled it at all? If so please leave me a comment in the box below.

P.S. If you know anyone who could benefit from this insight, take a second and send them a link to this post. You’ll be helping me… and THEM!

With love and gratitude – as always,

 

 

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Guilty as charged for poor time management

Posted on 20, Apr | Posted by JaneFrankland

Time to make time management sexy

Jane_Frankland_on_Time_ManagementI’m a sinner, I’m a saint, as Alanis Morisette sang AND I’m guilty as charged for poor time management and not valuing my time. Sound familiar? This week, however, the penny dropped. If I didn’t change my wayward ways with time management and value my time – MORE – I wasn’t going to get anywhere with my business.

That felt bad. That caused me pain and when something causes me enough pain, what do you do? You take action!

Something just clicked in my head.

So what did I do? Well I started to say no more often! And, whilst it was hard to do, it also felt great!

What help me? I heard a story….

Cue story…

The story involves Megan. She’s a mum and bringing up 2 kids on her own. She’s always been financially independent and successful in business. However, recently she decided to use her heart as her compass and follow her passion to be a coach. I’m sure this sounds familiar.

Perhaps not this bit though.

She did something that some people find either crazy or courageous… she quit her 6-figure job, that was making her ‘soul dead’, without many savings.

Now Megan has a wealth of experience in business and people have been flocking to her for advice and training, which she’s been giving away freely without a thought. She’s even been meeting up with them in person. However, this has been at a cost to her business as she hasn’t been able to reuse that time. Unfortunately too, the people she’s been having meetings with were unqualified prospects and therefore mostly filled by free loaders, not prospective clients. It was more luck if they turned into clients.

Eventually she started to think about what she was doing. If she was charging herself out at $150/hour, whenever she gave up her time, it was costing her that. When she went through her days, she was horrified at how much money she’d lost!

So, it was this simple exercise that made it crystal clear for her (along with the bills that were mounting up!). As a result, she started to consider more fully what she was saying yes to, and she started to say no more often. She began asking for agendas before requested meetings and letting prospects know that some things were going to be chargeable exercises.

She found this sorted the wheat out from the chaff.

She also discovered that she’d subconsciously started to value herself more and as a consequence had attracted the sort of clients she wanted to work with.

Time is a statement of priority

Time is a statement of priority. Never forget that. We all have 24 hours in our day. We’re all on a level playing field in this respect. It’s how we chose to spend it that makes the difference.

Time is one of our most precious assets. We’re all trading it. We can never get it back. So, what you say yes to undeniably means that you’ll have to say no to something else. [Bummer!]

Whenever someone says I don’t have time, what they really mean is “I don’t value this as a priority.” And that’s ok so long as you know. Incidentally there’s more on dealing with a time management objection here.

Now, I want to hear from you…

Do you suffer from saying yes too often? Do you ever think you might be sabotaging your own business for the sake of others (subconsciously)? Have you ever performed an exercise like the one Megan did? Let me know your time management story in the comments below.

With love and gratitude – as always,

 

 

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